Self-Care

6 Simple Mum Tips to Make Motherhood Enjoyable6 min read

Motherhood can be tough – there’s no doubt about it.

 

It’s wonderful, amazing, and beautiful, but it can also be hard to navigate, emotionally demanding, and downright exhausting at times.

 

If you’re finding yourself struggling to enjoy parenting, here are six helpful mum tips that might help.

Tip 1: Stop comparing yourself to other moms.

Look, we all know motherhood is hard.

 

It’s one of the toughest jobs out there. But sometimes, it seems like society only wants to focus on the negatives – the sleepless nights, the never-ending messes, and how tired we all are. 

 

This can lead to many mums feeling down about themselves like they’re doing a crappy job or that they’re not cut out for motherhood. But that’s not true! Motherhood is amazing and rewarding, even when it’s tough.

 

It’s OK to admit that you’re in a difficult stage. There’s nothing wrong with it. I find it actually healthy. But what I don’t encourage is always concentrating on the bad side all the time. 

 

Start by appreciating each day, each hour. Keep your focus on enjoying certain moments of your day. It can be how your child looks at you when they wake up. Or how they excitedly open the door for you when you come back home from work.

 

Whatever it is, choose that moment to be the highlight of your day. Before you know it, you won’t be dreading waking up to this motherhood gig every morning.

Tip 2: Change your perspective

We all know that negative energy is bad for our mental health. But how much does toxicity affect you as a mum?

 

Negative people can and will be a major drain on your energy and, in some cases, resources as well. Once you start associating with toxic people, you’ll be easily sucked into their vortex. Before you know it, your attitude and life are a mess.

 

The best gift you can ever give your child is being the best version of yourself. And we have to admit that’s hard to do if you’re constantly around people who bring your mood, energy, spirit and stability down.

 

Protect your sanity by staying away from everyone toxic, and that not only includes your friends, but family as well (especially that ex! yes that one).

Tip 3: Stay away from negative, toxic people

We all know that negative energy is bad for our mental health. But how much does toxicity affect you as a mum?

 

Negative people can and will be a major drain on your energy and, in some cases, resources as well. Once you start associating with toxic people, you’ll be easily sucked into their vortex. Before you know it, your attitude and life are a mess.

 

The best gift you can ever give your child is being the best version of yourself. And we have to admit that’s hard to do if you’re constantly around people who bring your mood, energy, spirit and stability down.

 

Protect your sanity by staying away from everyone toxic, and that not only includes your friends, but family as well (especially that ex! yes that one).

Tip 4: Stop comparing your child to other kids

When it comes to our kids, we can’t help but compare them to other children or even their siblings. It’s natural, but it can also be destructive.

 

Do you find yourself looking at your child and thinking, “Why can’t my child be more like that child over there?’ or ‘My child is just so different from other kids? If you’re nodding your head, then you’re not alone.

 

Many parents compare their children to others, often without realizing it. But just because most parents do it doesn’t mean it’s healthy. 

 

How would you feel if your partner compared you to his female colleague? I bet you wouldn’t be thrilled about any of it.

 

So, what’s wrong with comparison anyway?

  • Affects your child’s self-esteem
  • Makes your child feel worthless
  • Gives your child unnecessary pressure to be “perfect.”
  • Makes children believe that pleasing their parents is the ultimate goal in life
  • Brings about sibling rivalry
  • Breeds envy
  • Ruins the parent-child relationship
  • Undermines your kid’s unique abilities

How to stop comparing your child to others?

  • Acknowledge that you actually do it
  • Reinforce healthy thoughts by complimenting your child more
  • Identify and appreciate your child’s talents and strengths  
  • Spend more time with your child doing activities they like
  • Refrain from using comparison statements, especially when you’re upset

Tip 5: Appreciate yourself more

As mothers, we often put ourselves last. We’re so busy taking care of our families and juggling all of the responsibilities that come with parenting that we don’t always take the time to appreciate all that we do. 

 

This can be especially true if you’re feeling overwhelmed or like you’re not doing a good job. But it’s important to remember that being a mum is one of the most important jobs out there, and you’re doing an amazing job!

 

You have to take care of yourself, even if it’s just 5 mins a day. Not only will you feel good after, but you avoid getting in the mom rage zone where you feel burnt out and frustrated by everything and everyone.

 

Below are a few ways you can appreciate yourself:

  • Do something you love like working out, hanging with friends, reading a book, etc.
  • Have some time once in a while to relax and lazy around.
  • Plan a gateway with your partner or friends if possible and within your budget.
  • Pamper yourself

Tip 6: Don't be too hard on yourself

We all mess up. No one was born with all the tips and tricks of hacking motherhood.

 

All the parents you perceive as “goals”, or the people who seem to glide their way through parenting were 100% clueless at some point.

 

There is no written manual on motherhood. It’s one of those gigs you have to work through with zero experience and find your way. So, if you ever feel like a failure or you’re messing up your kids with your inexperience, remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough.

 

And honesty, through years of practice some mums have learnt to be confident in their parenting skills that you won’t notice if they’re anxious or stressed. You’ll also get there eventually. But for now take a deep breath, and give yourself a break.

 

As long as your kids are growing well, eating healthy, and causing havoc with their playfulness, then I’m sure you’re doing fine.

Incredible yet doable mum tips to help you enjoy motherhood more

If you’ve been struggling to appreciate and love being a mum, I hope you’ve found the above tips helpful. 

 

You’ll never find a shortage of “perfect” mums on social media that seem like they have their act together 24/7. They don’t have to yell to get their kids to listen, beg their kid to eat dinner or struggle with potty training. But that’s just a façade. No one is perfect.

 

Don’t let comparison, a negative mindset, or toxic people get in the way of you being the best version for your kids and family. 

 

I’d love to know which of the above mum tips you found most helpful. Leave a comment or send me an email at hello@wanjirumwangi.com.

Thanks for reading.

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